Q: I am a queer male who is only attracted to straight males; what is wrong with me?
A: It's likely that there's nothing "wrong" with you. Many gay men fantasize about "seducing" a straight man. If you look around on any gay porn site, you'll see thousands of videos on this exact topic. Why this is the case is hard to say, but there may be a "forbidden fruit" aspect to it, or some gay men may simply take it as a challenge. But, if you're "only" attracted to straight men, then perhaps you could work on widening your sexual interests. Perhaps it's simply that you're attracted to men who act stereotypically masculine and you haven't yet found other queer men who exhibit those traits. Of course, gay and bisexual men come in all shapes, sizes and levels of masculinity. So, you may have just not found the right queer guy for you, at least not yet.
It may also be that there is a part of you that doesn't want to have a romantic or sexual relationship at this point in your life. Being attracted to straight men is, in some sense, a very "safe" attraction to have, because there's nothing that will actually come from it. You're not going to have a romantic relationship with a straight man and it's unlikely you'll have sex with one either. So, perhaps you could talk to someone (a close friend or a counselor) about what may be keeping you from being attracted to the type of men that you could actually have a fulfilling sexual and romantic relationship with.
Answers provided by Dr. Ross Avilla
Dr. Ross Avilla has been teaching Human Sexuality since 2013 and has a PhD in psychology from UC Davis. Dr. Avilla is not a clinician and all information and advice offered on this website is for educational purposes only.