Q: As a girl I usually have trouble orgasming by penetrative sex alone. I've had the same partner for 3 years now and although the sex is usually enjoyable, I have a hard time reaching an orgasm. However, I recently started having multiple orgasms during sex. Is this normal?
A: First of all, congratulations! Hopefully, you're enjoying the multiple orgasms, especially going from someone who had difficult oragsming during sex.
Just enjoy it, because this is completely normal. A lot of women vary in how often and how easily they achieve orgasms throughout their lifetime. Sometimes women experience a change in hormones that can cause increases or decreases their "orgasmicity" or, more often, they begin to have sex in a different way or merely think about sex in a different way that affects their enjoyment of sex.
The fact that you had initial difficulty having orgasms is no surprise if you were having "penetrative sex alone." The vast majority of women (around 70%) cannot attain an orgasm from penile-vaginal intercourse alone. Most women also need to stimulate their clitoris while having sex in order to reach orgasm. This is something I stress over and over again in my Human Sexuality classes, because it's something every woman (and man) should know about sex. So, perhaps you experienced some change that allowed you to become one of the 30% of women who can orgasm from penetrative sex alone. In that case, congrats again! But, I would still encourage you to try some direct clitoral stimulation during sex too. You can use your or your partner's hands to masturbate during sex, use a vibrator against your clitoris, etc. Be creative and have fun! It can only improve your sex life.
Answers provided by Dr. Ross Avilla
Dr. Ross Avilla has been teaching Human Sexuality since 2013 and has a PhD in psychology from UC Davis. Dr. Avilla is not a clinician and all information and advice offered on this website is for educational purposes only.